1. |
Maybe It's Madness
03:51
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Just how deep in the skin can you get
Just how close to the bone can you go
Dear when I let you in I thought nothing was unsafe to show you
I’ve recycled the best of myself
And I find that I’m now someone different entirely
Maybe to please you but maybe it’s just something else
It could be fear; it could be sadness
It could be peering through your eyes to taste your gladness
It could be feeling through your skin; it could be wondering how you’ve been
It could be all that
Or it could be madness
But how lovely that you have stopped by
If you’ll have it please do stay for tea
I’ve got nothing to do so it’s really no bother to me
We can talk of your folks if you like
Is your sister still doing okay? If she’s not, can I help her? Or help you?
Or maybe you need something else
Was it your fear? Is it your sadness?
Have you been peering through my eyes to taste my gladness
Have you been feeling through my skin? Have you been wondering how I’ve been?
Well if you haven’t, maybe it’s madness
Or it could be hope; it could be yearning
It could be all the dirt within me finally turning
Giving up all that half life stuff; knowing I’ve finally had enough
Finding my gladness
Maybe it’s madness
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2. |
Maybe Next Year No. 2
04:07
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How come after all this time you take the backroads through the gallows of my mind
I dreamt a highway to escape the throes of knowing you again
Sing me a love song with words as simple as a child in a backyard
Her fingers deep inside the dirt
For I’d like to linger for a moment on the memory of that kid
Maybe I can call you once I’ve figured out how to be someone different
Maybe next year is the year
Life goes on quick; hear it only slows for those who can afford it
And you’ll be rich before you’re 40 like your dad says
But you might miss out on a few things in between
We hope to die poor but spend our whole lives working hard for just to save more
I’m not complaining, I’m just saying joy’s a cheap whore
Don’t take much money for a little conversation
So maybe I can call you once I’ve figured out how to be someone different
Maybe next year is the year
I’m from the inside of a country that’s been bleeding for a long time
These days a bruise is just a pool in steamy July
You paint a blue sky and everything is fine
So maybe I can call you once I’ve gotten older I’ll be someone different
Maybe next year is the year
How come after all this time I fool my sweet self into thinking that you’re right
I dream a highway I escape the throes of knowing you again
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3. |
Francis
03:44
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Francis I’m having a nightmare I can’t understand it
I dreamt I jumped for just to fall behind a cold and concrete wall
Forsaken from the garden that could last us
And Francis I’ll ask something tragic if you’ll please console me
If you’re to smile without me there or catch another’s lonesome glare
Would you at least remember me as holy?
Moon’s out; spotlight
Left bound, turned right on your street, in your drive
Gal, I must say something: I warned you, darling
Francis I know that I’m more of a child than a mother
So I loved you til the morning ran
When dawn collapsed and rules began
We won the night for just to lose each other
Hearts beat; hummed low
Whispered through the window of that room that you know
How it slips so slowly, slowly, slowly
Boy, have I had it, you know that I barely can stand it
That with the fuel of borrowed truth we managed to escape the youth
That gave us the excuse to run the gamut
See you sometime
Bright eyes; dark minds
Eyes ahead; I must drive
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4. |
Middle of America
03:51
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You can catch me gliding down the highways of my youth
There goes the hospital they tell me I was born in
There goes the grocery, the pharmacy, the high school parking lot
Behind the wheel you’d sigh and say “this town ain’t nothing”
By the fourth day of July the weather’s always far too warm
But still the only day that I could play with fire
And I often got my sister burned, said it was by mistake
I knew that mama wouldn’t take me for a liar
Is there anybody listening to me?
From the middle of America you scream out to the ocean it gets lost
Lost like those new shoes left, my dear you know how much those damn things cost us?
There is always that one girl who says that she’s too sad to sleep
And she reminds me of what daddy would’ve told her
That nothing is as good or bad as they will make it seem
I hear they feed that line to people at the border
Is there anybody listening to me?
From the middle of America you scream out to the ocean it gets lost
Lost like daddy’s pension fund, my God you know how much that’s gonna cost us
It rained so much last lonely spring it nearly drowned the earth
And if it had I would’ve built an ark of maple
I would’ve proudly let the skyway guide the highways of my youth
I would’ve welcomed all the world if I were able
Is there anybody listening to me?
From the middle of America you scream out to the ocean it gets lost
Lost like Lady Liberty who wouldn’t care how much it all would cost us
I hear someone knocking
It was just the mailman
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5. |
Into the Air
03:53
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John broke the news like a prized vase, he said that things like these just happen
And you best quantify what you’re saving because most things are designed for wasting
You see, I thought that he was the real thing, but I’d traded my eyes for a fantasy
And I’d traded my hands for a nail gun; locked myself up in a big box
It falls like water; tumbles and lands harder
You pick yourself up off the pavement
Evaporate into the air
You say you’re committed to changing, well then how come your laugh does the same thing
That it’s done twenty years in the making
Lifts and it twirls and it stands, before
It falls like water; tumbles and lands harder
You pick yourself up off the pavement
Evaporate into the air
Do we give it up once we’ve grasped it? Bodies all covered in sweat
Feeling for symptoms of grand revelation, finding that time just escapes us
As we fall like water; tumble and land harder
You pick yourself up off the pavement, evaporate into the air
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6. |
No Woman
04:34
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Everything’s so fragile; curse my careless grip
All that I could hold would only slip
And everything seems broken; blame my shaky hands
Life just makes me nervous; searching for the good things
Things that won’t just crumble into sand
I guess I’ll slip away til I’m gone
For no woman is free unless she moves along
Yesterday you folded; up and quit your job
Threatened that you’d kill your boss’s momma
But I bet his momma loves him, that she wouldn’t mind
Taking all your bullets; anything to save him
She would gladly give you all her life
So she’ll just slip away til she’s gone
For no woman is free; she’s imprisoned by love
Sister’s in the doorway; brother broke her heart
Wishes she had known it from the start
Wishes she could go back; back to Galilee
For there she’d learn the promise; that no one comes home spotless
And we must wager on that guarantee
So she’ll just slip away til she’s gone
For no woman is free unless she moves along
I met with the Big Man under last night’s moon
I told him that I’d like to come home sooner
He took me by still waters; kissed my shaky hands
Told me that he’d lead me; that I should rest easy
For everything is broken as it stands
So I’ll just stick around til I’m gone
For no woman is free unless she carries on
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7. |
Mortal Pin
02:48
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She’s a reckoning sweeping softly in
With her hair held up by a mortal pin
She’s a tidal wave, then a little lamb
Then a tree swept sideways, barely standing up
Barely holding up, but hardly looking down on someone else’s luck
Flying always seemed so lonesome anyway
So she’ll come back to earth with words she heard you say
As the day begins with the deepest cut
All the dreams you dreamed, all their setting suns
All the lower backs with their curvature
All the tightly bounded, being sure of nothing
Holding onto something; looking down on someone
‘Cause you had the gumption
Flying always seemed so lonesome anyway
So she’ll come back to earth with words she heard you say
She’s a reckoning with her hands tied up
But she’ll kneel right down and she’ll fill your cup
When it overflows, take that mortal pin
She can mop it up as the day begins
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8. |
Miss America
05:01
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Miss America, on that silver screen; shines like some old dream
So far life’s been in kind, but you’ve been wasting time-- has that flown through your mind?
And I’ve been staring at you darling, sitting back and wondering what the hell you’re gonna do
When all the force has run the gamut, and you sit back and dammit
Now it’s up to you!!
Yes you who eat your dinner with the TV on, and who smile thinking everybody else is wrong
Yes you who drink your coffee with the curtains drawn
Yet still it’s you that we’re all counting on
Miss America, gal you know the drill; could you just stand still?
Doc says this won’t hurt, so close your eyes and learn about how all this works
For I’ve been staring at you darling, sitting back and wondering how the hell you got this far
On loans as tall as New York City; skyscrapers look so pretty til you’re jumping off
As one who don’t read nothing but the bold faced lines
And whose prophets may as well be reading coffee grinds
Got all that ammunition just to blow your mind
Oh Miss America they’ve fed you lies
Darling don’t be shy, it’s alright to cry, you gon’ be just fine
Papers they don’t burn, and your voice will be heard no matter how it’s earned
And I’ve been staring at you darling, sitting back and wondering what the hell you’re gonna do
When all that force has fun the gamut and you sit back and dammit now it’s up to you
Yes you with all your jewelry and your high heels on
Think your looks are gonna last until the kingdom come
And who won’t apologize because she’s too far gone
Dear still it’s you that we’re all counting on
Yes you who’s always dressing up in preachers clothes
With your index finger wagging with the wind that blows
How could your heart be open if the door is closed?
And still it’s you that we’re all counting on.
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9. |
This One's on Me
03:59
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It did glide in like a sunbeam on a Thursday afternoon
So I nursed it like a sick kid; it just looked so much like you
Feel the stiff light; wish it goodbye, like a passing tractor beam
Deep October, she’s a dear old friend and a tightly woven seam
Between the daylight and the sharp night of the heavy hearkening
It’s there I greet you as a lonely child
Whispering “this one’s on me”
We grew up there in the thin air of the heavy slated sky
Endless winter, we could nurse her; we could cure her if we tried
Are you listening? Have you fooled me? Memories like an elegy
Why is something trying to push me to admit this one’s on me?
Is my silence just a violent thing? Do I house a crooked mind?
Happy people; try to be like them, robed in mystery and kindness
Skim the surface, let yourself sink back to innocent belief
It’s there you’ll find me, I’ll be smiling
My old friend, this one’s on me
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10. |
The Push and Pull of It
04:50
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I keep staring at this photograph
Its jagged tips that leave me here to think of how you’re gone
They always bring me back again to lie within myself, mm
And ain’t it true we play pretend?
Aint it true we let them sell us groceries and fineries and shining bright philosophies of life
Remember when your sister said you’d tried to kill yourself
And when I heard I nearly flew to Michigan right then
But it was just a false alarm, the new year rolled in heavy hearted
Remember how you cried inside the car parked in your driveway
Remember how you told me that I hadn’t even tried to save the last of it?
You raised your fist; I wish you would’ve held it in that time
Cuz I don’t mind the push and pull of it; I’m just fine to play pretend
I just kindly ask we never speak again, mm
And so it was that night set in at different times that fall
At some sweet hour everything would turn to black
And I’d ask myself if this whole mess was even worth my time, mm
Remember how we’d argue over Jesus Christ?
We probably should’ve opted for some other thing instead
Cuz I never quite forgave you for the awful things you said, mm
I never minded the letting go of it; I was fine to play pretend
Thinking we could manage not to speak again, mm
Now you say I have a careless heart and that I didn’t understand a single thing I did
I used to think that second part was truer than it is
Remember how much time we wasted hating things that moved us
Remember how I photographed you hanging by a thread, then up the phone
You know I loved you, though I never sought to mean that as I did
But still I do
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11. |
None of This
03:29
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None of this sneaking up on me, pressing your lips tight looming there softly
None of that old spin cycle, laundry’s been clean a long while
None of this playing the martyr, helping you get off harder
None of that car door slamming, none of those mean eyes grabbing at me
None of this claiming you loved me; none of this asking me how I’m doing
I’m doing just fine yes please, thanks
I’m doing I’m doing just great
None of this remorse rising; setting real low as you compromise your worth
No one’s quite pinned you down have they darling?
And none of that bitter thing where you feign indifference claiming that I was admired
I wasn’t admired I was stuck on the tightrope of your microscope eyes
And none of this was every warranted by something I did or said
None of this, none of this, none of this, none of this, none of this
None of your revelations, none of your trying to pin down my savior
None of your rich kid guilt trip, none of this life’s doing with us anyway
None of this claiming you loved me; none of this asking me how I’m doing
I’m doing just fine yes please, thanks, I’m doing I’m doing just great
None of this was ever warranted by something I did or said
None of this none of this none of this none of this none of this
None of that bitter thing where you feign indifference claiming that I was a liar
I wasn’t a liar I was stuck on the tightrope of your microscope eyes
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12. |
I Mean It
02:13
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Someday when it’s all over, I’ll stretch my shoulders
Warm myself on photographs and epitaphs of your life
Which threatened to change mine
So I drew a thick line; stopped the time and fled the scene, I mean to say
I love you, no I mean it I love you
Even when I don’t want to still I do; still I do
Someday I’ll climb up the mountain; feel good about something
Be somebody to myself, no one can tell
But I’ve been stuck wading through quicksand
It’s all complication, you said, when all you mean to say was just
I love you, no I mean it I love you
Even when I don’t want to still I do; still I do
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