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The Push and Pull of It

from Remember Me as Holy by Lily Talmers

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lyrics

I keep staring at this photograph
Its jagged tips that leave me here to think of how you’re gone
They always bring me back again to lie within myself, mm
And ain’t it true we play pretend?
Aint it true we let them sell us groceries and fineries and shining bright philosophies of life

Remember when your sister said you’d tried to kill yourself
And when I heard I nearly flew to Michigan right then
But it was just a false alarm, the new year rolled in heavy hearted
Remember how you cried inside the car parked in your driveway
Remember how you told me that I hadn’t even tried to save the last of it?
You raised your fist; I wish you would’ve held it in that time

Cuz I don’t mind the push and pull of it; I’m just fine to play pretend
I just kindly ask we never speak again, mm

And so it was that night set in at different times that fall
At some sweet hour everything would turn to black
And I’d ask myself if this whole mess was even worth my time, mm
Remember how we’d argue over Jesus Christ?
We probably should’ve opted for some other thing instead
Cuz I never quite forgave you for the awful things you said, mm

I never minded the letting go of it; I was fine to play pretend
Thinking we could manage not to speak again, mm

Now you say I have a careless heart and that I didn’t understand a single thing I did
I used to think that second part was truer than it is
Remember how much time we wasted hating things that moved us
Remember how I photographed you hanging by a thread, then up the phone
You know I loved you, though I never sought to mean that as I did
But still I do

credits

from Remember Me as Holy, released February 11, 2021
Lily Talmers- acoustic guitar, vocals, music and lyrics
Ian Eylanbekov- nylon string guitar, organ, synthesizer
Ben Green- trumpet
Geoff Brown- bass
David Ward- drums

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Lily Talmers Ann Arbor, Michigan

sweet truthful nothings

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